tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7725137789250152370.post404198124239761277..comments2021-03-15T14:29:06.488-04:00Comments on "Where's Baby Lily, Mommy?": # 22: PLEASE KEEP YOUR BABY!by Jenniferhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12620656009462393047noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7725137789250152370.post-80546365521815858682013-08-20T20:10:57.238-04:002013-08-20T20:10:57.238-04:00Jess,
Welcome and sorry to hear that you are a vi...Jess,<br /><br />Welcome and sorry to hear that you are a victim of adoption loss. I learned during our experience that there is no such thing as a legal open adoption (despite the fact that prospective adopters make this promise), and that many birthmothers end up with this devastating outcome. <br />Thanks so much for reading and taking the time to comment too. It means a lot :)<br /><br />Best,<br />Jennifer :)Jenniferhttp://www.abortedadoption.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7725137789250152370.post-6175472942962173842013-08-20T16:19:18.959-04:002013-08-20T16:19:18.959-04:00I just started reading your blog and I am hooked. ...I just started reading your blog and I am hooked. I am a natural mother who lost my daughter to adoption 14 years ago and her adoptive parents avoid me like the plague, like I am out to rip their perfect little family apart. Although, before the adoption, promised open contact until my daughter was 18. I wish there were more people out there like you! You actually care about the biological parents and their rights.Jesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13316706705395213882noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7725137789250152370.post-59279863875057140142012-04-24T00:17:19.377-04:002012-04-24T00:17:19.377-04:00Carlynne--
After what happened with Baby Lily, and...Carlynne--<br />After what happened with Baby Lily, and as soon as I began blogging--I kept finding myself drawn to all the first/natural/birth mother blogs. I've written this elsewhere--that I kept feeling like someone who shows up to a support group for something that they don't share with the others. I am not a birth mother. Why am I identified with BM blogs rather than adoptive parent blogs? Why was I so afraid for Kendra? And Bobby too?<br />After much soul searching--I am sure it is the PTSD connection. I have an extensive trauma history (unrelated to adoption), but I think the dynamics of the adoption industry--are something I felt on a visceral level before I understood it cognitively (and am still working through). Hence, I was able to put myself in Kendra's shoes. I only wish I could have been braver in certain ways--but it was so confusing during the process. <br />I have learned so much from the aftermath--b/c of my blog and reading the blogs of others. I have a whole new perception of adoption now.<br />It's no wonder that 1 of my 2 best friends is an adult adoptee. I'm telling you--it's the PTSD connection.<br />Stay in touch--I will check out your link as well.<br />Best,<br />JenniferJenniferhttp://www.abortedadoption.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7725137789250152370.post-62350612668799447362012-04-23T16:53:48.618-04:002012-04-23T16:53:48.618-04:00I so appreciate this post. I'm a mother who lo...I so appreciate this post. I'm a mother who lost a daughter to adoption 32 years ago. Today I posted on my blog about the lack of compassion in adoption and it's refreshing to see someone in your position actually thinking about what we, as mothers of adoption loss, go through. The heartbreak is forever. Thank you for the compassion and your ability to look beyond your situation to what others may be suffering.Carlynne Hershberger, CPSAhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01365785230628216814noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7725137789250152370.post-55385521187774781962012-04-12T23:51:42.175-04:002012-04-12T23:51:42.175-04:00Thank you Myst for your compliment. I'm defin...Thank you Myst for your compliment. I'm definitely flawed in other ways, if not in my capacity for empathy. The irony, as you will see, is that my concern for everyone involved ultimately left me in very conflicted territory. I'm still not sure that I did right by everyone, especially Baby Lily, but I also feel I was the victim of an unethical attorney. It's crazy because I am so drawn to all the first mother blogs--that's where I feel most comfortable even though I don't share the same experience. I wish I was reading the first mother blogs before all of this--I might have been braver (i.e. more direct) with Kendra and less intimidated by the adoption workers. Thanks for reading :) Now, I'm going to check out your site...<br />Best, <br />JenniferJenniferhttp://www.abortedadoption.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7725137789250152370.post-304871326023424012012-04-12T22:26:13.614-04:002012-04-12T22:26:13.614-04:00I just have to comment... I have been reading your...I just have to comment... I have been reading your blog since you commented over at Cassi's and find myself crying through many of your posts. It is so refershing to find someone who genuinely cares and who dares to put themselves in another person's shoes. Bless you for being such a compassionate soul. I only wish the people who have my child could have been like you and most likely I would have my daughter with me now. <br /><br />Just so you know, I pretty much stalk your blog to see when you have updated!!Mysthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07425550479815459790noreply@blogger.com