12/24/11
Christmas Eve Day
Approximately 3:00 pm
It turns out that Christmas Eve Day is an optimal time for visiting the pediatric emergency room. The place was empty when we got there. No other babies or kids or anxious parents. Just me, Tom, and Baby Lily.
"Where is everybody?" I wondered aloud.
Tom shrugged. "At least it won't be a long wait."
"I mean, there can't be less emergencies just because it's a holiday," I said.
"The pediatrician said the ER will likely fill up later. Typically gets busier at night."
"I guess. Or maybe parents are more likely to neglect a medical issue on a holiday. Unless it's like a blood gushing situation or something. Too much to get done on Christmas Eve. Too many guests coming for dinner."
We didn't have time to speculate further--we were already getting called back. The medical area was also empty--Baby Lily was the sole patient of the hour!
A nurse took Lily's vital signs. Tom held her while I explained the problem.
"Her belly button is not looking so good," I started. "It's oozing a ton of pus and it's quite red and we're worried that it might get infected."
The nurse noted that Lily didn't have a fever. "She's your first baby?"
"No, she's number three," I said.
I figured the nurse thought we were over-reacting first time parents, but she didn't act too surprised when I mentioned we had other children. What did throw her, however, was when she asked how old the other two are.
"Our girl is two and our boy is sixteen."
"You have a two-year old, a sixteen-month old, and a newborn? That'll sure keep you busy!" The nurse smiled.
"No, our son is sixteen years old," I corrected her.
"A teenager! You have a teenager? When did you have him? When you were in junior high?"
I was tempted to say yes but took the compliment instead. Sure I was young when TJ was born (age 21), but I don't look that young. In fact, I thought I was aging quite rapidly under our current circumstances.
After the nurse left, we waited for the doctor. This took longer than one might expect given that the place was deserted. Tom held Lily. I checked the time on my iPhone.
"This is ridiculous!" I exclaimed. "Where the hell is the doctor?"
"I don't mind waiting. In fact, I'd stay here all night. It could be the best Christmas Eve ever. I don't have to listen to your mom and TJ arguing. I finally have some peace."
"Come on, I think everyone's getting along pretty well considering the stress we're all under."
"But it's so much nicer and calmer in here." Tom kissed Lily's cheek. Then he looked up at me and mentioned Bobby the bio-dad: "Where's that interloper now? Huh? We're taking care of his baby, but where the hell is he? If he ends up contesting this adoption, I'd like to know where the hell he was hanging out this Christmas while we were taking care of his baby."
The doctor finally arrived, and he took a quick look at Lily's belly button. He didn't think it was problematic. We were told to continue cleaning the umbilical stump, etc. There was nothing to worry about.
Tom was feeding Lily. The doctor's exam had woken her up. She took down the whole bottle and was fast asleep again before the doctor stopped talking. "It's always better to be safe than sorry," the doctor went on, "cause you never know. It was the right thing to come in and have her checked out."
"Yeah, well, our pediatrician was already closed for the day."
Tom was trying to get a burp out of Lily, who was totally asleep upon his chest.
"Formula really knocks them out," the doctor said. "Breastfed babies never sleep as much."
"I know," I said. "I breastfed our other two. But we're adopting Lily. So, formula it is."
The doctor raised his eyebrows. "Wow, you guys are brave. Lots of people would be afraid of adopting a newborn because of fetal alcohol syndrome."
And with that he wished us happy holidays and the best of luck with Lily.
Shortly afterwards, as we drove back home, I asked Tom what he thought of the doctor bringing up fetal alcohol syndrome.
"Do you think he noticed something about Lily? Maybe he noticed something wrong with her?"
Tom scolded me for being ridiculous. "If he noticed something was wrong, he'd have to tell us. That's his job. And anyways, our pediatrician said she's perfect."
"Well, you can't always tell, you know. I mean, there are physical signs in more extreme cases. But no one can really know the effects of any amount of alcohol use on the fetus. And Kendra did drink until she found out she was pregnant. And she didn't find out until the 9th or 10th week. That's practically the end of the first trimester!"
Tom patted my knee. "Lily's fine. She's totally fine. She just has a yucky belly button right now."
We made it back home in time for Christmas Eve dinner. My mother had prepared the table and TJ and Sara were excited to start celebrating.
After dinner, we sat around the Christmas tree and I held Lily on my lap, facing out so she could see the Christmas tree lights. TJ was singing a Christmas song, and Lily seemed mesmerized--either by the music or the twinkling lights or both--but where was Sara?
I didn't see my toddler come running toward us until it was too late. Sara clutched a red stuffed doll in her hand. It was an Elmo doll. Sara's hand swung back and then--boom!--she hit Baby Lily straight on the head with Elmo.
I was too shocked to speak, but TJ, who had witnessed the whole assault, was first to reprimand his little sister:
"Sara! That's not nice! Santa's watching you and you're not gonna get any presents if you hit Lily. You better say you're sorry."
Sara pouted. "No!"
TJ moved closer to Sara and shook his finger at her. "You better say you're sorry, Sara. Santa's watching!"
Sara sighed. "Okay," she said and turned back around to face me, Lily and Elmo:
"I'm sorry Elmo."
Then, she grabbed Elmo and rubbed and kissed his head.
"Elmo's all better now," she assured us.
I couldn't help but laugh. Tom and TJ were roaring as well. Only my mom looked concerned. "She's a naughty little thing, isn't she?" my mom said. "She needs more discipline!"
"On the contrary," I said. "Sara's totally normal and that is probably the most normal thing that's happened around here since we took Baby Lily home. Sara's behavior is entirely appropriate for her age. It's the rest of us who don't know what to do in this situation!"
And it really was true. Sara's acting out normalized the whole adoption process. It actually made everything feel, well, as it should be. What parent hasn't had an older sibling feel threatened by the sudden appearance of a new baby in the home?
I'm sorry Elmo!
It was the comic relief in a tragic journey.
To Be Continued...